How important would it be for you to attract your idea partner in life? If you’ve been thinking about this, you might be wondering when you’ll find the person, where you’ll find them and your mind might be filled with uncertainty, hope, fear, excitement, worry and a whole mess of mixed up emotions. But no matter what you’re feeling, one thing is for sure: the time has come for making something happen in your love life.
But before you do, it’s important that you have three primary questions answered about attracting your ideal partner:
Who is Your Ideal Partner?
Okay, let’s be point blank about this one: what do you really want in a partner? What characteristics do you require in order to be happy and fulfilled in a relationship? Most people, when asked this question, will either tell you one of two things:
What they Don’t Want
The characteristics of your idea partner need to be a list of positive things that you want instead of negative things that you don’t want. For example, have you ever heard someone say:
“No one who lies, cheats, complains too much, no financially irresponsible people…”
Okay, first of all, who DOES want these things in a partner? The more focused you are on what you don’t want, the less awareness you’ll have of what you do want and the less energy you can commit towards looking for what you do want. Not to mention that if you focus only on the negatives that your list is likely to grow as your life experience grows.
Focus instead on what you do want, and make sure that you don’t make the second mistake…
Is your ideal partner someone who: is honest, who treats you well, who is responsible and faithful, attractive, a great lover and a good potential parent? If so, I’m sorry but you still have no idea what you really want out of a partner. Instead, you’ve simply agreed with over 90% of people out there who are also looking for someone: honest, who treats them well, who is responsible and faithful, attractive, a great lover and a good potential parent.
If you want to attract your ideal partner, you need to know what you’re looking for and you need to get specific. Of course, you do want to make sure that your list of “must haves” doesn’t run the risk of excluding the right person. But without standards, you run the risk of settling for something that “seems right.”
TIP: Relationships which work are based on the fulfillment of the needs for certainty, variety, significance, growth and contribution. Ask yourself what kind of partner will help you meet these needs and write down your answers.
Are You Ready for Them to Arrive?
Okay, so there’s never a perfect time to do anything…but it’ also true that lack of preparation is one of the primary reasons why people miss out on wonderful opportunities in life. So how can you determine if you’re ready for your ideal partner to arrive into your life?
Simple, look at the characteristics which you’re looking for (you wrote those down right?) and ask yourself this:
“Am I the kind of person I need to be to attract my ideal partner and build a meaningful relationship with them?”
Be honest about this and don’t cheat yourself, or your partner…wherever they are. It’s unfair to expect your ideal partner to fall for you just because you want someone like them in your life. You also have to commit yourself to becoming the kind of person who they will want to be with.
This is where the next question comes in…
What Are You Willing to Give?
There’s no such thing as something for nothing. This is true in your financial life, your health and in your relationships. You can know exactly what kind of partner you want, and you can have your life together and be 100% confident that you’re the kind of person they would want to be with…but you still have to go out and find them.
(unless you fall in love with the person who delivers your mail)
The level of success you have in your life will always be equivalent to the level of commitment you have to achieving that success through planning, action and persistence. If you want to meet and attract your ideal partner, it’s time to ask yourself what you’re willing to give in order to have them.
In other words: do you need to set your pride aside and join an online dating site? Do you need to start getting out more and going where single people are? Do you need to start talking to more people of the opposite sex…those who you don’t yet know? Do you need to learn to be a better listener?
Do you need to be more responsible? More compassionate? Have better manners? Have more confidence? No matter what it is, go back to your list about the ideal partner and start being honest about what you’re willing to give to get what you want.
Sure, it might be easy to say:
“But they’ll show up eventually…they have to. After alI, I deserve to be happy.”
Yes, you may deserve it. But you probably also know that it’s VERY easy to deserve something and still never get it. If you want to get something you really want, you usually still have to work for it…deserving or not.
That’s where the next step comes in…