Now that you have thought about what you’re looking for, you have to focus on yourself. How can you be your extraordinary self? If you want a relationship to work, you need to focus not only on his behavior but also on YOUR behavior.
Go ahead and take a peek in the mirror. Do you see someone who is confident and secure? Stylish and put together? Are you taking care of yourself? These are all things you need to look at before you go find Mr. Right!
As the lyrics from the Liz Phair song say, “I am just your ordinary, average everyday sane psycho supergoddess.” Know who you are, and don’t be afraid to BE THAT! The best thing you can do for yourself is be confident, know yourself and be proud of it.
Be something that is worth pursuing and keep yourself interesting. Here are some areas you might want to examine in your own life.
- Have your own life.
- If you begin dating someone, don’t become them. Be yourself, and have your own life.
- Have your own hobbies that make you unique and quirky.
- Stay involved in your activities even after you begin dating someone. You don’t have to spend every waking second gazing into your lover’s eyes.
- If you have your own life, your potential mate will find you interesting and attractive. If your only current hobby is trying to find a man, you might need to find other interests to occupy your time.
- Discover your inner strength.
- Inner strength is when a person has:
- Peace of mind
- Are you good with one or more of these things? These can be crucial to not only a good relationship, but also in being a successful adult who can handle anything.
- Do you take care of yourself?
- Chapter one discussed what to look for in a man who takes care of himself. Are you doing the same?
- Keep yourself active. Whether you enjoy gym workouts or just a nice walk with your pooch, keep active and take care of your physical health. Get your butt out there, literally.
- Be at your best. Keep yourself clean, showered, smelling nice and dressed to impress.
- You never know if you might run into the perfect man at the grocery store, so make sure you pay attention to what you are wearing and how you carry yourself.
- Be confident!
- Whatever you do, do not be Debbie Downer! No man is going to pursue someone who appears depressed because she “can’t get a man” or for another reason.
- Be proud of your accomplishments, and don’t be afraid to take credit where credit is due.
- Try to be positive. Your body language, words and appearance need to say to a man that you are confident in who you are.
What does that even mean? Being extraordinary doesn’t mean you have to be Superwoman. It does mean that you are trying to be the best you can be. It means you are being yourself and that you have the self-esteem to be proud of who you are.
Men are looking for someone who is independent, has self-esteem and knows how to take care of herself. Some men fall for the whole damsel in distress bit, but it’s not a good way to get a quality man if you always seem to be in need.
Being extraordinary means using what you’ve got. Use your talents to set you apart from the rest of the ladies. Take pride in all of your abilities.
The opposite of that is knowing what you need to fix about yourself. Always try to improve yourself, and be the best you can be. Find your weaknesses and fix them. Yes, it might mean you have to escape your comfort zone in your little bubble to try something new and break the bad habits.
Also, take the time to put aside pride, and say you’re sorry. It’s fine to be prideful if you do something worthy of praise, but if you are in the wrong, always apologize. In addition, be forgiving of others’ mistakes.
When a man sees you trying to be your best not only physically, but also with your personality, it will make you even more attractive in his eyes. You care about the person you are and the woman you want to become and that means a lot to a man who is seeking a long-term relationship.