Understanding the importance of the seven secrets and the need for using fair fighting and good communication is great—but what happens if your partner is stubborn, resistant, and refuses to play by the rules?
In some cases, you may be able to win your partner over. In others, however, you may need to seriously assess the value of your relationship.
When your relationship is struggling or has already ended due to the stubbornness of your partner, try these approaches:
- Talk: Open up to your partner and express your desire to build a happy, healthy, and fulfilling relationship. If you have already split up, state your desire to get back together and rebuild on a stronger foundation. Give your partner time to listen and respond. Not every relationship is salvageable, but many are if both partners work together.
- Evaluate: Once you have explained your intent and your position and listened to what your partner has to say, take the time to evaluate your situation. If you and your partner are in trouble or have split up due to minor concerns, you may be able to overcome the issues by employing the seven secrets yourself. If your problems are more serious (cheating, violence, or total lack of respect), carefully evaluate whether your decision to stay and rebuild is the right one.
- Encourage open-mindedness: If you have decided to work on your relationship, set the example by overcoming stubbornness yourself. Work on exploring all possibilities together. Learn to give and take, even on points you have been reluctant to concede in the past. Show your partner that you are willing to compromise and he or she may be willing to bend a little as well.
Stubbornness can be a major obstacle in building a healthy, strong relationship. If both you and your partner are willing to work at it, it is possible to overcome. The most important thing is to lead by example.