Is your goal to get out of the dating game and into the relationship phase, entering into a meaningful, passionate, fulfilling love affair that’s here to stay?
Go from single to committed with one key play: Show him who you are (without apology) and keep true to yourself for the very reasons he fell in love with you in the first place.
Do you want to know one of the biggest reasons men leave a relationship and move on to the next? It’s because his girlfriend wasn’t upfront about who she really was and what she really wanted from him, and thus, changed the rules of the game halfway through it.
No one likes surprises in a relationship, or at least, not ones that will make you think: “Oh, so that’s what you’re about?”
Just as much as you wouldn’t want him to grow a goatee if you made it clear you can’t stand facial hair, he doesn’t want to be abruptly surprised by you cutting your long locks into a pixie cut after he made it clear he can’t stand that style ¾ and you agreed.
Here’s how to stay true to yourself in a relationship, so that from day one, he can begin falling in love with you and stay there:
- How honest is too honest? Honestly, honesty is crucial. It, along with trust, is the foundation of a long-lasting relationship. But how much is too much? Make this your rule of thumb ¾ any information that can be misconstrued as slutty or prudish is a no-go.
Stay clear of past relationships, funny stories of your ex and tales of your co-dependent mother. In general, during the courtship process, be mindful of conversation topics until you know what will rub him the wrong way.
- Be mindful of the booty call. If he’s into who you really are, you won’t be a midnight, drunken booty call. He’ll introduce you to his friends and family, and he’ll eagerly be introduced to yours. He’ll show up in daylight with you, without hesitation.
But, if you go from his date to booty call, beware. There’s a thing called the platonic friend zone, and if you want a serious and meaningful relationship with him, you don’t want to go there.
And once you’re there, unfortunately, you’ll always be there. It’s extremely hard for him to think of you as a quick romp in the sack to a girlfriend he respects and loves.
To avoid these unpleasant situations, respect yourself, set your boundaries for what you will and won’t tolerate and show him who you are outside of the bedroom. Knowing you will help form a passionate relationship with him inside the bedroom, too.
- See yourself as you are right now, and don’t make excuses. Studies show that couples that stay true to their convictions have a clear perception of who they are as individuals and are more likely to have an exciting sex life and meaningful relationship.
Don’t apologize for your passion for feeding the homeless or painting murals in your spare time. These are the things that will set you apart from everyone else and rightly so.
- Love yourself unconditionally, with or without a man by your side. He’ll love you as you are, and when you stick to your guns about your personal boundaries, and non-negotiables, he’ll love you even more.
Do you like your alone time? Do you love to ski? Don’t ditch whom you are and what you love to do as soon as “Mr. Right” comes along. Instead, include him in your plans, and he’ll have instant respect for you.
Supporting His Dreams as If They Are Your Own
You’ve met him, and now you want to keep him. How do you keep him emotionally engaged better than by diving headfirst with an unmatched interest, passion and enthusiasm for his dreams, goals and aspirations?
Your enthusiasm will set you miles apart from past women who haven’t actively played a role in his life goals.
It doesn’t matter how small or big his goals are. That’s not the point. It doesn’t matter if he wants to open his own Brazilian fusion restaurant or open up a batting cage business.
The important thing to remember is it’s not about you. It’s about him and what matters to him to make a meaningful life.
- When he talks about his goals, transition yourself from lover to friend. When you’re in the bedroom, unleash your inner sex kitten. When he’s revealing his lifelong dream to travel to Bali, be his best friend.
He wants you to listen, support him and be on his team. Show him that you not only like his idea to be the next senator, you’ll vote for him too!
- Ask him how you can best support his dreams. Sometimes it’s confusing to know how you can best support him. Does he want your opinion, advice or just to be a sounding board for his upcoming pitch to HBO?
Don’t misread his signs. To be on the safe side, ask him how you can best support his goals. Is it by helping him keep a monthly goal list and stay committed to accomplishing them? Or is it just by offering encouragement along the way?
- Help keep him on track! Show him you’re not just his girlfriend ¾ you’re his cheerleader and biggest fan!
One of the hardest things about accomplishing dreams is having the patience to see them grow into something real. He might give up when he’s halfway there, so take the cheerleader role and don’t let him!
When you begin showing him you’re in this through thick and thin, despite whatever success or failures he endures along the way, he’ll begin falling for you…hard.
Why? Because every other woman in his life bailed when he erred, and you’re not one of them. You’re different. You’re special, and when you support his dreams, you’re showing him just that.
You have what it takes for someone to fall in love with you. You’re successful, independent and attractive.
Who would pass that up? The trick is showing him who you are with ease, caution and respect. Once you do, you’ll quickly transition from his Miss Maybe to his Mrs. Right.
How to Talk to Men
Check out the video below and discover how to talk to men in such a way that he LOVES talking to you, opening up to you and so that he sees you as a truly desirable catch that he loves forever…
Watch This Video: How to talk to men